5 Years Later
by SassafrasTea
Summary: 5 Years after the Pein attack, the 4th Shinobi war is over and Tsunade get an unexpected visitor.(Completed!)
1. Chapter 1

**He'd been gone for five years. **

_Five years was a very long time. _

Tsunade watched the man she had mourned until she thought she'd die from it, sit on the other side of the desk and talk about what had happened. Her whiskey eyes focused on the pinned sleeve, evidence of what he'd lost.

Jiraiya in the deep rumbling voice, hoarser now than it had been, spoke of lands outside the Allied ones, places where ninjas and chakra were the stuff of stories. Shards of the inhibitor rods in him, no way to mold chakra without an arm, he'd been stuck and slowly healed far away until finally, he'd been able to get his himself a boat and a crew to sail home.

Tsunade sat, fingers steepled and simply absorbed the shock of him being alive and in front of her. She wanted to jump the desk between them and throw her arms around him. She wanted to touch and stroke and make sure he was real, but she was scared, scared this was all a mirage of an overworked mind and she'd, he'd be gone in an instant just like he was in her dreams.

Jiraiya looked at her as he sipped tea with his remaining hand. She looked sad, tired even. He'd dreamed of coming home and seeing her and holding her in his arms, well arm now. Was that it? Surely not, they were children of war and a missing limb wasn't an oddity. Why wouldn't she reach out to him? Why wouldn't she say his name and that she was glad to see him back?

Please, his mind whispered before words came audibly. "Hime, I won our bet. Don't you think I've waited long enough for our date?"

She startled nearly spilling her tea across the desk. Of course fool, just ask and I'm yours. "You need to let me look at you and do a physical. It's been nearly a week since you came home, I can tell you are in pain. Let me heal you, and I'll go out to dinner with you tonight."

He sighed. He had purposely dodged the hospital. His body was riddled with evidence of how close he had come to death. To have her see it, to show her how he failed her, failed the village was nearly more than the white headed Sannin could take.

He knew her though. She'd never let him leave the office, if he refused. One arm, a dozen arms weren't enough to dissuade her when she got her mind fixated on a course of action. One finger, long boned and tanned rubbed his hair line as he attempted to throw her off. "I didn't know you wanted to get your hands on me that bad Hime. You should have spoken up; I would have stripped for you the day I came back."

"Fool," was her response, full of irritability. Tsunade knew, of course she knew that he was attempting to cover up his unease. How many times had they played this game? Heeled steps followed by his swaying ones, the sounds of a body still not used to the loss of an arm walked to the hospital and the first empty room they came to.

Her arms crossed and an eyebrow rose. "You said you'd strip for me Jiraiya. Do it now so I can see how badly you've hurt yourself."

Dark eyes focused on her whiskey ones, he sighed and turned his back unable to stand the expression she was sure to have. Haltingly, a hand pulled up the kimono to and slid it off his broad shoulders. There had been no need or even way to wear the normal under armor he had before the fight. Jiraiya, legendary Sannin of the Leaf, was a Shinobi no more. Bare save for the cloth tired to the end of his arm, the Toad Sage stiffened when a manicured hand touched above missing flesh.

"I'm sorry Hime. I meant to stay whole for you, and I simply… I failed you."

Her brow furrowed. He was alive. It was all that mattered to her. Tsunade couldn't, refused not reach out and touch and know for sure that he was here breathing and in front of her, but his words, his self loathing words wounded. Hands that touched dropped and she stepped away angrily.

"You're an idiot. You think scars bother me. You think losing your damn arm is going to drive me away. Does unblemished skin mean that much to you."

Tsunade jerked her obi knot loose and dropped it to the ground before shrugging off her gambler's jacket and kimono top. She didn't cover her bare chest, didn't make an attempt to cover the scars that riddled her abdomen and the line from where she was bisected. Instead she stalked in front of him and grabbed his hand to put it to the raised flesh.

"Should I be sorry as well? Did I fail you Jira?"

His eyes focused, how could they not, on her chest, before it processed that his finger wasn't touching soft supple skin, but instead the smooth almost slick surface of a scar. Knees popped as he squatted down and traced his finger over each raised line. Just how close she had come to dying while he was in a foreign land?

"Hime…"

Jiraiya slowly, knowing she was likely to kill him for it pressed his face against the softness of her stomach. "And you call me a fool. Precious woman, like I would ever think less of you for having battle scars. Don't be naïve."

Tsunade rested her hand on his head and ruffled his hair. "You're an idiot Jiraiya and a fool as well. I'll do the physical and you can take me out to dinner. You won the bet after all."


	2. Chapter 2

She asked him to stay with her that night. He'd nearly choked on the ramen he was eating when she said the words. Jiraiya wanted to ask if it was out of pity. Did she feel guilty for not arguing more and going with him? He titled his forward in acceptance, not trusting himself to speak. In truth it didn't matter, five years in hell he'd take whatever pity scraps she'd toss him.

The tab was paid. In the five years he'd been gone Tsunade, keeper of his estate had simply collected his royalties and set up stipends for Naruto. He was a rich man for all that it cost him.

Her apartment smelled like tea and her perfume. It was a heady combination.

"I'll just-" He trailed off looking down at her in question. He was with her in her bedroom, the rumpled blankets a foot away and he was terrified out of his mind. What if he messed this up? What if she changed her mind?

"Lay down Jiraiya."

"I'll just lay down then."

Stiffly, not even removing his kimono top that smelled not surprisingly like the ramen shop, he laid down on his back. What was she up to?

The bed shifted as she crawled across it, still dressed. The scent of perfume got stronger as she curled up against him, arms around his neck and cried, deep harsh sobs that shook her small frame. He took it, took every bit of her tears. His arm, tanned and roped with lean muscles curled around as he stayed resolute; a lighthouse to guide her back.

When the sobs quieted to small whimpers and then nothing, Tsunade spoke. Her voice was rough and it halted as she told her tale of the last five years. She talked of the Pein invasion and of grabbing Katsuyu for dear life and pouring every bit of chakra she had into the slug.

She talked of thinking she was going to die, of expecting to die when she stepped down into the gully the rebuilt village sat in to face off. Her voice held a tinge of wonder when she spoke of Naruto stepping in front of her and telling her to go drink tea and then waking up six months later to find they were going to war and the sacrifice she made to save who she could meant nothing.

Her arms tightened then and there was a small silence before the Sannin spoke of war preparation and the coming together of the five Allied nations to fight. She spoke of her fight with Madara haltingly as the memory haunted her nightmares nearly every night.

Her voice brightened as she recalled Orochimaru of all people showing up and putting her back together and then of nearly killing herself again to summon as much of Katsuyu as she could along with her pupil to provide a foothold for the Shinobi alliance.

Tsunade lapsed into quiet after that. The war over had been and she'd come home after healing the wounded. The Leaf quietly buried its dead and rebuilt.

What could he say to her? He was a master of word craft, a bestselling author, but what could he say to the shattered woman holding on to him?

"Hime, I wish…I wish I had made it back sooner. I wish I had two arms to hold on to you and the ability to be strong, to be your shield so that you never have to face anything alone again." His tongue came out to wet dry lips. "I'm a broken man, but these pieces of me. There yours if you want them. I give you my shoulder to cry on as long as you need it. I give you my hand to wipe away the tears. I give you-"

The words were cut off as she moved and sealed her mouth over his. It was a kiss a lifetime in the making and he wouldn't sully it by trying to speak more. She tasted of noodles and the tea she'd drank with dinner along with a deeper flavor reminiscent of honey. It reminded him of being a child and finding the combs in one of the Leaf's towering redwoods. He'd been stung a half dozen times but it had been worth it for the sweet reward.

When they broke for air and she curled back up against him, relaxing in sleep, and worn out from her breakdown, he kept his arm tight around her. He had her now, had this Senju princess and enigma of a woman. He wasn't going to let go.


	3. Chapter 3

Jiraiya stared at the ceiling. It had been a week since he'd first spent the night with Tsunade. They hadn't kissed again, although she tended to pat him like some sort of great beast she'd tamed, just a hand on his shoulder or even a lean against him. Was she still scared he would leave? A snuffling sound brought him out of his musings, they hadn't kissed again, but he'd spent every night in the blonde's bed with her curled tightly against him.

And Tsunade, Princess of the Leaf snored.

His hand smoothed back blonde hair before making its journey down to where her shirt had rode up in sleep. Fingers long and calloused traced the scars he could feel. It hurt him, knowing she had been so close to death and him a continent away.

"Hime, Hime wake up." The words were spoken before he even realized the intent. There was a plan formulating in his mind, a need to protect his precious people. He focused on her sleep creased face as she blinked up at him before looking ill tempered.

"Are you on fire?" she asked bluntly, eyes still languid with sleep.

Knowing that any answer was going to get a glare before she simply collapsed back on him in sleep, the Toad Sage spoke quickly. "I need you to make me a prosthetic for my arm. I need something so that I can mold chakra again."

Her whiskey gaze cleared and sharpened as she sat up, letting the blankets slide off her shoulders to puddle on the bed. "I have an idea, something I've been working on with the Kazekage's brother." Her hand reached out to touch the stub of flesh that was once his arm. "I attach chakra receiver rods, under the skin and attach the chakra network to them. The prosthetic itself has an artificial chakra system in it, your chakra and nerve endings would stretch via the connection and work the limb just like it was yours."

Tsunade moved, leaning over him as her voice got faster evidence of all the work and thought that had gone into this. "You don't have to be a puppet user to operate the limb. It's an amplification of your own chakra network. The sensitivity is as close as you can get to the actual thing."

He watched her, half in wonder. This was the Tsunade he hadn't seen since they were teenagers, the earnest and striving medic. She was happy, happier than she was behind that desk he left her with and happier than she was been on that bench.

"Do it. Heal me and fix me an arm. I want…" His free hand came up to pinch his nose, a sure sign of nervousness. "I want to hold you properly and I need two arms to do it."

She blushed. Even in the dark of the room, he could see the red tinge; almost feel the heat rise from her. It made him grin and sit up so that his face is close to hers, white teeth glinting in the moonlight as he teased.

"Your face is flushed. Are you getting sick Tsunade?"

The blush intensified even as she inwardly berated herself. Damn him for getting under her skin. "I'm not. I don't get sick."

"Hime if you aren't sick, why is your face red?"

Whiskey colored eyes glared at him, even as her mind scrambled to form a retort. He unnerved her just as much as he brought peace with his presence. It was an odd jumble, but it worked. Her mouth opened before closing again with a snap as his fingers traced her cheek.

"Can I touch you?"

The words were asked quietly, his low voice barely reaching her ears even with the stillness of the room.

"Can I trace fingertips over your curves and see for myself that you're real and whole?"

Time had changed them both. He wouldn't have asked for permission in his youth, and she would have never granted it. This whole scenario would have never played out. A brow arched, a forced show of nonchalance to combat her shortness of breath.

"Smooth words Jira. Is it a line from your book?" There was a pause before she added in a much softer tone. "Trace what you like, I'm not going anywhere."

She nearly unmanned him. Her smooth words and soft yes had his hand trembling like a genin on his first mission. Still, still he pressed on, lightly tracing the curve of her cheek before ghosting over plump lips. She was soft, despite her abrupt personality and completely still as he touched his fill.

Fingers tucked an errant strand of hair behind her ear, only to have it fall back forward immediately. It made him smile and move on to touch her ear and then curl his palm so that the back of his hand smoothed down the cords of her neck.

Tsunade parted her lips and kept her eyes steady on his face. He looked as if he was solving some great puzzle, his hand moving down her neck and across the expanse of her chest. He didn't dip below the v of her sleep yukata, instead merely followed the line of soft cloth down and up before moving his hand back and waiting. Any move more, would be because she wanted it.

Manicured hands undid the ties at her side and slowly the fabric slid from her shoulders to rest on the bed below, leaving her bare from the waist up.

"By the Sage you're beautiful."

He hadn't meant to say to say the words out loud, but wouldn't take them back. She looked like some deity brought down from on high, the shadows playing on her frame so that her skin appeared dappled and full of secrets. His breathing deepened even as his hand kept that same light touch, tracing ribs to where waist indented and then down and across following the line of scars from her battle with the Uchiha. It still scared him, how close he came to losing her.

Her hand closed over his and brought it up to curve around her breast. Startled dark eyes glanced up to meet her amber gaze. He wouldn't ask if she was sure, he wouldn't ask anything, not when her breast was a heavy weight in his palm, the tip already pebbled. His calloused hand dropped curving around her waist to haul the blonde into his lap, wanting her closer, needing that contact.

Heat met heat through the layers of clothing and had her hands dropping taking big fistfuls of hair to pull his head back and touch her mouth to his. It didn't matter that they were too old for this sort of nonsense, or that he was scarred. It didn't matter that she had spent more of her life broken than not.

All that mattered was now, here, and each other.

He wanted her, more than anything he wanted to strip their clothing and sink into her. His body shook with it, and he was so hard it hurt. But he wouldn't, not like this. When they made love he would have two arms to do it with, and he'd love her like she deserved.

Jiraiya reluctantly pulled away and panted resting his forehead against hers. "Hime I ca-"

Her finger came up to touch his lips, silencing him.

"Idiot, do you think I don't know you." She said lightly even as her body churned with need. "Let's sleep; I have a lot to do tomorrow and a letter to send to Suna."


	4. Chapter 4

Tsunade bit her thumb. It was a gesture carried over from childhood, and not a hygienic one, but it helped her mind focus. The call had gone out to Suna and the measurements taken from Jiraiya's remaining arm to base the prosthetic off of. She performed the surgery yesterday to slip the amplifier pieces under the skin and then worked for hours attaching the complicated web of chakra to them.

There in a waiting game now, and the Toad Sage was anything but patient. He'd left the hospital and had since taken to pacing and snapping at anyone unfortunate enough to try and strike of a conversation with him. His actions didn't trouble her as much as his words a few nights before. He was still hung up on losing an arm. He was still convinced that bit of missing flesh made him less a man.

It simply wouldn't do.

She loved him, would never say the words but he was hers and with or without an arm. He was whole in her eyes. She looked down at her ragged thumbnail and dropped her hand in disgust. Jiraiya needed a heel in the ass to get out of this rut, and she was just the person to do it.

He was easy to find. The man had holed himself up in her Hokage quarters with his typewriter slowly pecking out his next novel. It was a pitiful sight to say the least. Tsunade let the door slam behind her and strode over leaning so that her face blocked his view and spoke in an even tone.

"You're a terrible writer."

Charcoal eyes dragged themselves up from her exposed cleavage to glare at her. "I don't need your critique Hime."

She smirked and inwardly danced glee. He was perturbed, she wanted to see if she would tweak into outright anger and then go from there. "Really, I thought you valued opinions, or can you just not take someone not falling down on you in adoration."

"What the hell are you talking about Tsunade? I'm…" He voice was rough and almost guttural as he stood towering over her. "Why are you doing this? Like I need someone flattering me, I put up with you and you wouldn't know how to be nice if it bit you on the ass."

Her foot, heeled in black stepped on the table, followed by the other as she moved to lessen their height distance.

"Bah, look at you. Pecking away at your writer like some sort of broken thing. Where's the Sannin I fought with? Where's the man that fought Orochimaru while drugged? Hmmm… where did he go?"

Jiraiya reached out, his hand curling into the collar of her kimono top as his voice rose in a shout. "He broke! He went to go fight like a good little Shinobi and got his arm ripped off and left for dead by a bitch of a Hokage who couldn't be bothered to care!"

Her brow rose, even as her stomach trembled. Did he really think she didn't care? They thought he was dead. Ma and Pa Toad said he was dead. Still…still she wouldn't back down, not from this and not from him. Her hand curled around his wrist and she jerked it back with a flair of chakra, uncaring that the fabric ripped before he could let go.

"Why should I care? Give me a reason." Her voice was sharp egging him on. "Why should a care about a man, because you for damn sure aren't one of my Shinobi right now, who let the loss of his arm of all things define him? Who let one lost battle define him?"

He swelled up, his mouth opening to spew venom, when it clicked what she was doing. Tsunade was crafty, as crafty as it comes. He knew her though, knew that she'd push and prod at him until he was man and then turn it so that he was laughing. Hadn't she done the same thing when they were young and the horrors of war had him breaking?

"You should care because I'm stupid in love with you, Hime."

The blonde stilled her body and even her breath came to a halt as the words processed. How long had they danced around their feelings? She stepped back and her heel met only air. The world tilted as she started to fall, only to have it go in reverse as he grabbed her arm and jerked her back to press her body to his.

"You would think I flustered you Lady Hokage?" he mocked letting her go to slide down his body to stand on her own.

She let her shoulders slump, and for once admitted defeat. He'd gotten under her skin, wormed his way into her heart and she…she was just sick of fighting it.

"It surprised me is all. I thought I was only one stupid with their feelings."

There was silence before his fingers reached out to trace her cheek gently, knowing exactly what it cost her to admit her feelings in the light of day.

"Can I have you Hime? I know I'm not whol-"

"Idiot," she responded venomously. "You could be missing every limb and be whole to me. If you haven't released that yet, I'm simply wasting my time here."

She unmanned him, took those bits of pride and indifference he armed himself with and broke through them as sure as if she'd punched him. She made him strong, forced him to stand beside her, when all he wanted to do was crumble. It was an uncanny thing, to have come so far and only be starting.

-Go to bed Hime. I plan on loving you for the rest of the day."


	5. Chapter 5

Her stomach trembled. It was an odd thing to have nerves at the thought of being bedded by him. Tsunade knew it, and knew his body as well. How many times had she healed him, touched rent flesh and left it unmarred? They'd fought a war together and fell asleep on each other, comfortable as puppies when they were children. He'd held her after she lost her brother, and then again when she lost Dan.

So why was she nervous?

He walked into the bedroom behind her, tall and brimming with masculinity. It made what was feminine in her yearn and want, made her soft when she'd been hard for so long. Hands, manicured save for the ragged thumbnail undid her obi and dropped it to the ground. He simple stood there, unmoving and watched as her body was revealed.

The kimono styled shirt hit the ground before the rest of her clothes were shucked. Eyes the color of wild honey glanced up to meet his. Tsunade shivered, the room wasn't cold but she shivered anyway in a small show of nerves.

Jiraiya watched her strip, knowing what was coming and worried he'd fumble it. They weren't virgins, far from it, but this blonde, stomach scarred and eyes looking steady at his was his first love, only love.

"You're gorgeous." He said quietly before his hand went to untie his belt. The Sannin stripped to be as bare as her, putting his body on display for her to look and touch as she wanted. He was hers, wounded and broken as he was every bit of him.

"You are too." Tsunade replied letting her nerves go. It didn't matter if they fumbled. They had time to try again and get it right. Her hand rose to press fingertips to the raised flesh on his chest. "Make love to me Jiraiya."

He smiled then. She was as bossy as ever, and he was more than willing to follow where she led. His head ducked to press a light kiss to her crown before his arm snaked around her, pressing their bodies together as he fell on to the bed laughing at her squeak and muffled curses.

He released his hold on her waist, switching it instead to grasp that pointed chin and angle her head down for a kiss. She tasted like tea and slightly sweet like dango. It was a heady combination and he tasted his fill of her.

She let him lead; let him direct her movements and when his hot wet tongue invaded her mouth, Tsunade sucked on it in a mimicry of sex. She could feel the length of him against her thigh. It made her want to throw away any semblance of foreplay and sink down on him heat to heat until they couldn't even remember their names.

The meeting of mouths broken, he turned so that she lay beside him. His hand moved then, leaving her face after a last touch against her parted lips. He followed the cords of her neck, down to where her chest rose. Large calloused fingers tweaked and plucked at her nipples until they pebbled and his name broke her lips. It made him painfully erect, but he wanted more. He wanted her thoroughly satisfied.

Lower and lower still his hand wandered, pressing against her stomach and brushing tight curls to touch where she was already wet for him. Fingers brushed the bundle of nerves, teasing it as she shook and moaned.

-More

His thumb kept pressure on that ball of nerves as a finger delved lower and deeper.

-More

Another finger and a teasing dance of digits curling and seeking that spot to make her scream.

-More

His mouth moved to take her breast in between teeth and nip before soothing with his tongue.

Tsunade turned her head left than right, her hair a tangled mess across the pillow. She could no more stop her hips from rising and the sounds of need falling from her mouth than she could her next breath. He was taking her, each push and pull of his hand and swipe of tongue had her closer to that sweet edge.

"Jira- Jiraiya please" the words were a plea, an ache of need, a mate calling out for their other half. He complied, his hand doubling its stroke and fingers curling and twisting until she seized, mouth open in a silent scream and came hard against his hand.

By the Sage she was like a goddess herself, all needs and wanton cries as her body flushed and shook. It made him greedy to see her fly again. Another finger added and he pushed again at tightened walls.

She wasn't having it. Her body was burning up and she wanted, needed to have him there with her. The Sannin pushed him back flat to the mattress throwing her leg over him and pressing heat to heat.

"I need you."

He panted twitching against where she was wet and against him. How could he deny her? Why would he even want to?

"Take me then Hime."

A flex of hips, a hissing breath as they joined flesh, he'd imagined being with her for longer than he wanted to admit, but nothing prepared him for this. She was aggressive and bold and it was all he could do to grit his teeth and hold on as she rode them both to completion.

Later, when she'd collapsed forward on him in a panting puddle of satisfied woman, he chuckled. His hand came up to smooth back where her hair had fallen in front of her face.

"Well Hime, it looks like you beat me again. I'm no match for you."

Tsunade lifted her head to look at him with tired eyes. "Damn right, although knowing you… you'll just keep trying on the off chance you'll win."

His chuckle turned to an outright laugh as he reached to pull the covers up and over them.

"You know me too well."


	6. Chapter 6

It would have been romantic to say he lost track of how many times they'd made love that night. Jiraiya lay comfortably on his back in the predawn light and listened to the soft breathing of Tsunade beside him. It would have been romantic, but the five times they reached for each other would be forever implanted on his mind. It would take a force out of this world to have him forget a single moment of it.

She was, magnificent hardly seemed the word for it. Goddess seemed trite; Queen was apt, both to him and her role in the Leaf itself. The Sannin chuckled lightly at his musings. She was his. Somehow, someway despite his mistakes and carelessness, she'd let him in. Dark eyes glanced over at her, face slack in sleep and limbs akimbo across the bed. There was a bit a drool on her cheek, and her blonde hair had been mussed so much it curled.

"Sleep in Hime. You deserve the rest." He said in a whisper before rising to dress in the near dark.

A week later Kankuro, with the prosthetic safely scrolled away came to the village. The fitting went without a hitch. The new polymer, based off of zetsu cells gave the arm a lifelike look to it. Eventually, Tsunade had plans to re-grow limbs utilizing the research she had, give them a chance to gain back what they had lost. For now, the prosthetic was best she could do.

Jiraiya sat stripped to the waist and slowly curled and straightened the arm, moving fingers to get the hang of it. The sand Shinobi went over the basics of the limb. It was water proof, sand proof, and was held on by the chakra threads. Pull your chakra into yourself to remove the limb for repair.

He's walked past them, seemingly oblivious to the words being spoken. Tsunade, eyes questioning followed until she understood. There were summons to call and contracts to re-sign. The broken man was the Toad Sage of the Leaf once again. Her hand rested on the puppet user's shoulder in thanks before leading him back to her office.

"Thank you for the quick work on this Kankuro."

"It's not a problem Lady Hokage. The Sand owes you our gratitude. After the war, you could have simply healed your Shinobi and gone home or put the Leaf's injured first. Instead you specified by injury regardless of what village. If not for you doing that, my sister would be dead."

Tsunade settled into her chair, worn out as she often these days. Getting older was hell, she wouldn't deny it and counted the days until Naruto was able to finish his Hokage training and take the hat from her.

"Those are kind words Kankuro of the Sand, and I've heard Temari might be making the move to the Leaf permanently."

He grimaced, still a bit wary of his sister leaving the Sand for the laziest ninja he'd ever met. The shadow user didn't deserve her. It was plain as the purple paint on his face, but he made her happy and such had the blessing of the Kazekage.

"Seems so."

Her mouth opened to ask about the Kazekage when Jiraiya pulled himself through the window to land light as a cat. He strode forward and reached out his hand to shake the Suna native's heartily. "You've given me means to protect my precious people. I won't forget it."

Kankuro merely nodded a bit at sea until he saw the man look back to the Hokage. There had been rumors, had been rumors long before the man's supposed demise that the Slug Princess and Toad Sage were more than old friends. It seemed there was no need for rumors now.

"Lady Hokage, if I have your leave."

She nodded absently, attention on the hand he waved like it had always been his. There was relief, more than a bit of it that turned into confusion when he shut and locked the door being the retreating jounin.

"Baka, if you think we're going to-"

His laugh cut her off. "Don't be naïve Hime. When I take to you in here, it'll be a night and there won't be a chance of someone walking in mid deed."

"It worries me that you already have this rendezvous planned out Jiraiya."

"Be quiet for a minute Hime. I have something to say, and I wanted peace to say it."

Her head tilted in a listening gesture. He seemed nervous and she couldn't fathom why. They'd been together every night for the last few weeks, and intimate more times than she could count in the last few days.

"Well tell me Jiraiya. I have things to do today."

"Impatient woman I want to tell you thank you and that I love you more than life. You're making it difficult for me. It's a wonder I try at all."

"Kiss me, idiot. Kiss me and get the hell out of my office. You can tell me thank you when I come home tonight."

His lips curved before the Toad Sage strode across the office to pull her into his arms, arms that could protect her, arms that he would hold her with tonight. "I'll kiss you, and tonight I'll have dinner ready when you come home as thank you, and after… well we'll just see won't we."

There was a shiver down her spine. One that had her wanting to say to hell with tonight. She couldn't though, tempting as it was.

"I'll look forward to it."


	7. Chapter 7

Jiraiya paced the apartment he shared with Tsunade. It had been an almost natural thing for his few possessions left to migrate here, to have his tooth brush sit besides her's in the bathroom and his getas in the same pile her heels were by the door. It made him dizzy with the knowledge that he was finally where he wanted to be and with the woman he pined for since he was a child.

Of course, all the words he had for her, all the promises he wanted to make were on hold until the Hokage actually came home. Time ticked by until frustrated, Jiraiya jerked open the door only to be face to face with a startled Shizune.

"Lord Jiraiya," she squeaked before her voice leveled out. "I have a note for you from Lady Tsunade."

He reached for and raised an eyebrow as Dan Kato's niece scampered away. Did he scare her, or did it have something to do with the note? Curiosity piqued he unfolded paper to read the slanting scrawl.

_**I don't know when I'll be home. Idiot chunin forgot which of his kunai was tipped in poison and a genin tried to spit a senbon and swallowed it instead. **_

_**-Tsunade**_

Jiraiya set the note aside. He was less than useless in a hospital, healing beyond his skills. Still the Toad Sage had been around Tsunade enough to know two things, one it took massive amounts of chakra to heal multiple people and two she'd be starving when she got out. He hummed to himself as he pulled out what was needed. Hokage or not she'd at least have a simple meal to come home to.

Tsunade yelled out for the basin to set the punctured tonsils in. She wasn't sure how the child had managed it. He'd sucked the senbon so far into his throat the point stuck out the back of his head. It was the grace of the Sage himself that his spinal cord hadn't been punctured. Still there was damage enough and he wasn't close to the last patient she'd be doing the surgery on this night.

Hands covered in the cooling green of her chakra pulled out the tonsils and sealed blood vessels. She worked each movement precise and measured. This child would be fine as would the rest of the people on her surgery list.

It was nearly four in the morning when the last case was settled. The Sannin swayed as she left the hospital, each step feeling as though she was walking through mud. Her body was a wreck, the 5th Great War taking pieces that never came back, one being her stamina. It had her sinking down on a bench outside the tower and leaning forward to rest her head in her hands.

Five minutes later she was snoring sound asleep on the bench as the sky slowly lightened and the world woke up around her.

He found her there and sank down beside her sleeping form in relief. When daylight had hit and Tsunade still not back, Jiraiya hadn't panicked or at least he wouldn't admit that he panicked and left to go to the hospital only to see her outside and covered in the dew that had fallen, snoring away.

"Hime," he said quietly as his heart resumed its normal rhythm. "You are a piece of work, you know that. You work so hard to heal others and leave nothing for yourself." His hand, the one that was his reached out to run a finger across her cheek. She scarcely moved, only sank down deeper on the stone her body trying to rest and recover what was lost.

When Tsunade woke, it was to her darkened room and the faint sounds of Jiraiya's typewriter. She sat up yawning as her eyes adjusted. Her body felt tired still and there was a gnawing pit in her stomach saying that she needed to eat and soon. There were questions that needed answered as well. How did she get home from the hospital and why, why was she stark naked?

Jiraiya heard her moving and walked to the small fridge to pull out the plate he had fixed her the night before. A quick run in the microwave and it and a glass of milk was on the table, water already set to boil for tea. His feet padded silently down the hall to the bedroom before leaning against the doorjamb.

"How are you feeling?"

"Terrible," she replied reaching for her robe. "Why am I naked?"

He ran his tongue around his teeth, tempted to tease her. The shadows still under her eyes after a day of sleeping stopped him though. "You fell asleep walking home from the hospital. When I found you this morning, you were covered in dew. I took the liberty of stripping and drying you off before putting you to bed. I have a plate for you. Come sit and eat before you fall down."

She hissed, chafing a bit a being told what to do. The Sannin wanted to tell him to stuff it and that she needed to go to the office, but the growling in her stomach was becoming a roar.

"Fine, I'll eat before going up to the office."

"You're not going to the office today Hime. I found you on a bench this morning and you are still shaking after sleeping all day. You're going to eat and we're going to have a talk about you not taking care of yourself."

Whiskey colored eyes narrowed. "Who the hell do you think you are to tell me what to do?"

The Toad Sage was tempted to say that he was the man in love with her stubborn ass, but he wanted her to eat and not storm off when she could barely walk. "Please Tsunade, I'm not asking lightly."

She stomped past him to the table, sitting down with ill grace to eat. He unnerved her and pissed her off, but she'd do what he wanted for the moment, biding her time to tell him off.

It was the milk that set her off, or rather the comment that she could have tea after she finished the glass. All at once it didn't matter that he was worried or that he cared enough to cook and heat it up for her. Tsunade felt her back stiffen and the glass, milk and all was hurled across the table nearly taking his head off if not for a quick dodge.

"Can you not?" he snapped in response. "Can you for once in your life let someone take care of you?"

"I'm not letting you or anyone else telling me what to do Jiraiya. I'm the Godaime Hokage not some child and I swear my Grandfather's bones try to boss me again, I'll feed you your teeth."

Said teeth flashed in a mirthless smile. "Really now Lady Hokage, your temper is still the same as when you were six. Are you sure you're not a child?"

The fist flew, and for once didn't land. Whether it was her own exhaustion slowing it or Jiraiya refusing to placidly take her temper didn't matter. He shifted catching her wrist and twisting it back into an arm bar behind her. She stomped down hard on his instep to try and loosen his hold but he didn't relent.

"I'm serious Tsunade, I'm not going to idly stand by and watch you kill yourself with exhaustion and ill life habits."

It made her shoulders sag, those quiet words. "Let go of me Jiraiya, and we'll talk."

Slowly his fingers loosened and gave her back control of her wrist. It was a relief that she hadn't broken her wrist and taken the injury to turn around and keep fighting. He wouldn't have put it past her. Tsunade was a hell cat when angry, and fought like a demon.

Dark eyes stayed on her small frame as she moved to the couch, sinking down on the cushions with a tired sigh. "I'm hurt. When I was defeated fighting Madara, I drained nearly all my chakra to try and heal the other Kage. I planned on holding Katsuyu there long enough to heal them and then forcing the rest of my chakra into them so that they could go after Madara.

Orochimaru came before that happened, but for me to have fully healed my insides and replace what chakra I lost… it would have killed the Uzumaki girl with him, so I healed enough to scar over my wounds and then healed the other Kage to keep fighting. Chakra that I gained back was siphoned off when I was in the Tree of Life. I'm hurt. I'm hurt in ways that I'm not ever going to recover from."

Tsunade closed her eyes. "I'm just trying to make it until Naruto takes the hat."

His hands reached to take hers, lips pressing against her knuckles. She was the best of them, and whatever means possible he was going take care of her like she had so many others.

"Hime, why didn't you tell me earlier? Never mind, stubborn woman I know why."

She laughed and opened her eyes to focus on him. "I am stubborn, and I'm bossy. Don't tell me you've forgotten that."


	8. Chapter 8

There was a change. It was subtle, but threaded through their dealings with each other. Jiraiya had been prepared to die; his mortality was something that he knew could be imminent. Her death however, he couldn't, wouldn't accept. Dark eyes that had watched her for the swaying of hips and curve of her chest, focused on the waist that seemed thinner, the eyes that were duller than they had been before his fight with Pain. Was it exhaustion that simple pulled her down, or was she in truth a hair's breadth from falling quite literally apart?

It made him worry, and it made him plan. A word here to Shizune, a word there to her guard, and a sterner word, one that he spoke from his full height of six four to the elders set in motion a gradual lessen of the burden on her. The Hokage was the fire shadow of the Leaf, but that Fire needed to be nourished or the shadow along with the rest of it would go to smolders.

Tsunade felt the change. Paperwork was slowly disappearing from her desk; there was a sort of hush in her office that had never been there before. The evenings were suddenly free instead of work keeping her tied to the desk until late into the night. Sakura had suddenly taken a stronger interest in the hospital and Shizune as well. It was unnerving to say the least. Still the office was not so changed as her personal life.

Jiraiya had stopped arguing with her, and he hadn't made love to her once since she told him the truth about her being hurt. Was she not attractive to him anymore? Realistically the Sannin knew that sex wasn't the end all be all top being intimate. He loved her, had loved her for decades. She knew that, knew him, but why, why did his kisses graze her cheek instead of lips. Why did he hold her, but not in the way she wanted?

It was evening. Another one where the work in her office disappeared and there was no call from the hospital, nothing for her to focus her attention on. Heeled feet walked through the tower only to stop outside the apartment and hear the faint clicks of a typewriter through the door. She couldn't do it, couldn't have another night of sitting like polite strangers. Tsunade walked past and out, feet following the familiar path to the local BBQ joint, wanting sake and meat, anything to take her mind off the teammate in her apartment.

She was barely a bottle in, when the door jingled open letting in the cooler air of outside and a party of special jounin. Their boisterous voices were in a direct contrast to her ill spirits. She had a mind to raise her voice, a yell to quiet to them down and give her peace with her choice of oblivion, but Aoba's words stopped her.

"Did you shake in your sandals when he walked in the jounin mission room too? I know he doesn't take missions anymore, but we all heard the stories of the Madness of the Village. Lord Jiraiya looked ready to murder someone, and all because of the Lady Hokage." The crow jutsu specialist started to speak more, but paused and blanched when a blonde head and eyes that burned lit on him. There was an audible gulp as her hand rose to gesture the party of jounins over for an afterhours meeting.

A few more bottles down, and the threat of knocking each one of the jounins back down to genin later, Tsunade walked to her apartment. It was near midnight, but sounds of a typewriter and the smell of a pipe came through the door. Of course it did, she thought none too happily. The idiot thought her not being at full strength meant she was like a child and unable to make decisions.

Jiraiya was in for a reckoning.

A manicured hand hit the door. Nails pulled out of wood and seven feet of sturdy oak fell to the ground with a clatter loud enough to rouse the building. A porcelain mask peered down the hall in question only to wisely pull back. The Toad Sage looked up from his writing and quickly sat his thinking pipe aside, feeling twin shivers of relief and trepidation at the sight of her.

"I'm going to kill you."

His eyes watered at her sake soaked breath, but he was nothing if not stoic. "Why is that Hime?"

Tsunade swaggered, hips jutted and heels miraculously staying under her. She moved across the living room until her toes bumped against his. Cheeks flushed with anger and sake, she spoke with the grace of the very drunk, that is to say none at all.

"You asshole of a man. How dare you talk to my jounin behind my back? How dare you… you"

"How dare I attempt to help you, you mean?" He replied temper causing his voice to rise in response.

"I didn't ask you to help me! I didn't ask for any of it and you know that."

"Hime, what would you have me do? I won't stand by idly while you kill yourself"

"Idiot, idiot Jiraiya, you say you love me and then won't touch me. You say you want to help me, but then go behind my back. Stop lying to me."

He stood then, frame towering over her. He wanted to yell and rattle the building, to grab her shoulders and shake until she saw sense, but he was terrified to touch her, terrified that she would bruise and break. Tsunade had always been the stronger of them; she'd always been the toughest, but now? The hand she made for him clenched before deliberately relaxing.

"Of course I want to touch you. Why would you even think I don't? I'm just-"

"Just what Jiraiya? Just sorry you came home and I've changed. Just sorry that you professed your love and now are healed and stuck with me? If that's the case, I release you of any damn bond we had. You can take your damned typewriter and leave. Find yourself someone you can stand to be with."

"I'm scared I'm going to hurt you, you obstinate hardheaded, evil woman!" Emotions and control broke loose as his hands rose to curl around her biceps. "I'm scared that you are going to open that damnable seal and there won't be any coming back from it. I'm scared that these few months are all I'm getting with you before you kill yourself working too hard. I'm scared that I'm going to wake tomorrow and you're going to be a corpse beside me. Do you not understand the depth of what I feel for you? For Sage's sake, I've loved you since I was six."

It deflated her, sake soaked as she was, angry as she was; there was no defense for his words. "I- I won't leave you willingly Jiraiya. Please believe that. We've wasted so much time." She sighed and reiterated. "I've wasted so much time."

He let out a breath. Of course she would have seen his help as meddling. Tsunade was so independent, so sure that she could do it alone; someone taking the burden would be seen as a distrust of her abilities. He loved her, stubborn as she was, and accepted the hard headedness along with the rest of it.

"I may have gone overboard with worry. I'll apologize for that, but not for caring about you."

"Worrying you mean," came the snarked reply.

"Both, I care so I worry Hime. You should know that by now. Isn't it the same for you and this village?" His hands loosened from their hold on her, stroking where he had grabbed. "You smell like a brewery. Let me run you a bath, not for your sake, but for the sake of my sensitive nose."

It would have been easy to shrug him off and stagger to the bathroom herself, just to prove she could. The blonde didn't though. Small steps, Tsunade thought. They would be okay, and she'd learn to lean on him just a little bit.

"Bah, I suppose I could use one, if you'd stay long enough to wash my back that is."


	9. Chapter 9

"Baa-chan" Naruto whined as he shifted foot to foot. He was the hero of the Leaf and arguably the strongest Shinobi in the world, but at this moment he felt like an academy student being scolded. "My handwriting is fine. I don't need a refresher course datte-bayo."

Tsunade rested her chin in her palm as he made his case. She had no intent on backing down. Chickens had better scrawl than the boy, and if he was going to take her hat that had to change. "What I fail to see is how you made it this far with poor writing. I can't even read your mission reports baka. How do you expect to do this job when anything you write is illegible?"

Whiskered cheeks reddened. "You're just getting old Granny. That's why you can't read it. You need glasses! I'm going to be Hokage because I can protect the village better than anyone else. I won't let it get destroyed like…like you did." Hands covered his mouth after the words were out and his eyes shut expecting to be hit for his outburst.

"Get out."

"Baa-chan?"

"I said get out Naruto! Iruka Sensei will be setting aside time to work with you. I'd advise you to take the lessons to heart." She snarled and waited until the door shut before sinking her head into her hands and letting out a short scream of frustration.

He'd been napping on her balcony; well really it was the slope of the roof under her window, but the area slept fine. Jiraiya keep his eyes closed as he thought over the conversation. Naruto was full of himself. Kid had good reason to be, he'd surpassed his sensei years ago. Still it had been an internal fight not to jump up and give the boy an ear twist for disrespecting the Godaime.

He wondered if Naruto understood the depth of what Tsunade had done when Pein attacked. He heard the account straight from her and it was enough to curl his hair. She'd poured all of the chakra she had built up into the village, drained herself to a husk to try and save who she could.

Did he not understand? The dead don't normally come back to life. Tsunade had saved everyone she could and paid dearly for it. Nagato's rinnegan hadn't been in the equation. She saved lives at the cost of her own; not knowing a one off miracle was going to render her sacrifice moot.

When her scream reached his ears, Jiraiya pulled himself up and climbed through the window. Butt comfortably leaned against her desk; he waited until she raised her head. "Well Hime, you did say Naruto was more like Kushina than Minato in personality."

A manicured hand ran through her hair in a futile attempt to keep it out of her face. "Kushina would have bit her tongue off before talking to me like that." She sighed. "I don't blame the kid. He's never really forgiven me for sending you to fight Pein alone."

His brow winged up. "You sent me? I told you I was going and left, wouldn't even let you send a team or come with me. Why would he think you… you let him think it. Why do you punish yourself like this?"

He shook his head. No one was as hard on Tsunade as she was on herself. For all her words about people being fools, she took the cake when it came to taking care of herself. Of course they'd had steps, small ones. He tempered his meddling in her life, and she worked to take better care of herself and made the vow to leave her seal alone unless it was a matter of life or death. It was less than they wanted from the other, but for the moment they made due.

"I'll talk to the boy."

Tsunade felt a smile curve her lips. "Bah, he's a teenager. He'll calm down, and if he doesn't I'll take care of the matter myself. I'm not so far gone; I can't knock sense into kid."

It was on the tip of his tongue to protest. Naruto was his idiot pupil. Instead the Sannin nodded before changing the subject to a lighter note. "You should wear glasses Hime. You'd look like a sexy librarian."

There was a snort of laughter before her hand moved to touch his knee, a light show of affection. "Bah, I'm not playing part in your lurid fantasies."

"It was worth asking. I'll just have to imagine it until I can talk you into wearing them." He teased leaning down to press a kiss to the top of her head, before shoving away from the desk and climbing back out the window. "Take care of my Kage, I'll be home tonight."

She felt her cheeks reddened at his words. They were rarely affectionate with each other, it wasn't considered to be Shinobi, but these small snippets of time and gentle words. They enamored her. "Bah, take care of my Toad. I don't have time to go to the pond and look for another."

It took Jiraiya under thirty minutes to find the boy nose deep in a bowl of ramen. He sat next to him and raised a hand for an order. Dark eyes caught sight of Naruto looking at the prosthetic appendage with a frown before the tell tale grin appeared. "Pervy Sage, can we train datte-bayo? I want to show you the new technique I'm working on."

The Sannin nodded absently. He wasn't sure how to tell the kid that he was off base. Tsunade had taken the brunt of Naruto's scorn as a form of penance and seemed to still be beating herself up all these years later.

"Being Hokage is a tough job." He finally said filling the silence as he watched his ramen being made. "There's a certain balance to it."

"If Lady Tsunade can do it, then I don't see why I'll have a problem, datte-bayo. I'm going to be a better Hokage than even my dad."

Jiraiya turned in his seat and put a hand on his godson's shoulder. There was a lesson here, and it was long overdue. "The Godaime is the best Hokage this village has ever had. If you've not realized that by now, you're blind. How many lives are here because she healed them? She wrote the book on medical ninjutsu and changed the way missions are done, all with the purpose of protecting the Leaf."

"She sent you off to die! Lady Tsunade let you go fight Pain alone and then didn't even care enough to have someone try to find you. She let Pein destroy the village and then hid away for six months. She failed. She's a drunk and shouldn't even be allowed to be Hokage anymore."

The Toad Sage said nothing, only nodded to the girl behind the counter when she handed him his order. Chopsticks were pulled apart, and noodles stirred in an absent gesture. Naruto was an angry teenager. While it had been close to forty years since he'd been in the same boat, Jiraiya attempted to relate.

"The village needs the Lady Hokage. She was the best person for the job when she took the hat, and she's still the best person for it now. Grow up Naruto, being Hokage means making hard decisions. Tsunade has always put this village first, and you wouldn't be here if not for her medical skills."

Naruto shrank back, chastised. He was angry, had been angry for years about her dismissing him when the knowledge came of Jiraiya dying. "But you lost your hand because of her datte-bayo." The words were spoken quietly. He knew the Hokage only did what she thought was right for the village, but she hadn't done enough.

"Nagato took my arm not Tsunade, and that's the last I want to hear on it. If you think you can be a better Hokage, than get your act together and learn the job." He pushed the bowl over, not even a bite taken. "Eat and then you can show me this new technique of yours."

Blonde head jerked in response before attacking the bowl of noodles. There was still anger in his gut, but his Sensei was back. He'd get to see Naruto become Hokage and protect the village better than anyone else. The lessons on handwriting could be tolerated as long as it got him closer to his dream.


	10. Chapter 10

"You talked to him didn't you."

Jiraiya paused back stiffening before he deliberately relaxed it. He ended coming home late and smelling like the hot springs, Naruto showing his new technique had morphed into a sparring match that left much of the training ground battle scarred. He needed a soak before his back seized up. The Toad Sage nodded slightly as he finished pulling off his vest, the hope for a night of curling around the blonde in bed falling away.

"I did talk to Naruto today. He had a new technique he wanted to show me."

Tsunade set aside the scroll she'd been looking over in bed, the report on hospital supplies could wait until morning. Legs crossed under the comforter she watched him change as the Sannin considered her next words. "Hmmm, you know Ichiraku Ramen is not the most secure location to hold a conversation you don't want to get back to me."

"Really Hime, I'm surprised at you. You have people spying on me?" He spoke incredulously while reaching for his sleep yukata.

She snorted. "Bah, as if I would. You'd have to do something interesting first. I had ramen for dinner and the girl from the shop told me about it."

"You wound me, not even worth the effort to spy on." He kept the affronted look on his face as he climbed into his side of the bed, absently reaching to pull her into his arms. By the Sage he was tired, Naruto had chased him all over the forest when they sparred and his body was feeling the strain.

Jiraiya had always run hot. When the fighting during the Second war had been at its worse, and the Sannin then jounin spent nights in cold caves and leaky tents she always slept burrowed against him. The warmth and knowledge that he was safe soothing her despite the circumstances. She did the same now, head tucked under his chin and legs tangled intimately.

"How did the arm hold up?"

The fingers splayed across her back flexed. "I was able to form a rasegan with it. Surprised me that I had the chakra control in that hand to do that."

Lips curved, she'd have to write the Puppet user to say that their combined efforts had paid off. Of course, that too could wait until morning. For now she was content to lie there. "I should make you do the lessons with Naruto as penance you know. You've always had the prettiest writing out of our team."

"Hime," Fingers traced her spine as he thought hard. Not that he didn't love the boy Naruto was his godson after all Jiraiya just really, really didn't want to do it. "Hime, you know I would, but… but I just don't have the time."

She leaned back away from him, brows raised in question. Jiraiya wasn't active duty. He wrote, slept on the roof outside her office, and trained. "Baka, surely you could have thought of a better excuse than that."

"I had a hard day; I'll have a better excuse tomorrow I promise." He quipped, chest rumbling with suppressed laughter. "Although if I'm teaching Naruto, it would cut into my nap time. I'm not sure I can give that up, or give up listening to you berate Sarutobi's grandson for hounding you about missions."

"Hmmm, the boy's like his father. Remember when Sarutobi had us babysit his children as a mission?"

"Hime no"

"Hmmm, we had all three of the hellions. I thought Orochimaru was going to cry when Asuma threw up on him." she laughed rolling to her back, eyes crinkled. "Will of Fire, I think we were twelve when that happened. We had those kids and Nawaki as well. It was a mess."

"And you, the great Slug Princess turned tail and ended up bringing Lady Mito back with you. She fixed rolled egg sandwiches and put the lot of us down for a nap. We failed that mission, I'm sure of it."

Laughter echoed in the room. "I'd forgotten about the sandwiches, rolled over egg and jam sandwiches. It was her go to, feeding a million children special."

His teeth had flashed in a wide grin when she laughed. This was what he'd wanted, peace and someone to share it with, no not someone. Her, it had always been her. "I love you Hime."

Laughter stopped, a flush taking its place. "I know you do, and it's the same for me."

The grin widened. "You're embarrassed," he teased, leaning up slightly to peer at her. "How very Shinobi of you Tsunade."

"Shut it," she replied eyes narrowing into a glare. "I mean it Jiraiya, I'll smother you with a pillow, don't think I won't."

The want to tease her more was a near ache in him, but he wouldn't give into it. Instead a hand rose to cup her cheek before he pressed his lips to hers. She responded arms going around his shoulders to hold him to her, enjoying the taste of him. Bodies shifted so that he hovered over her, legs caging her own.

The mood turned lustful as heat rose between them. His hand dropped to cover the curve of her chest, until the devil in him rose wanting one more tease. The kiss broke and a brow rose. "Hime, when you say smother me with a pillow, are you talking about your breasts? I'm not going to lie; if I had to die that would be the way to go."

He grinned even as the bed pillow hit his face.


	11. Chapter 11

They made love that night, not the hurried coupling of new lovers but with the familiarity of the long acquainted. Hands that had seen so much war were gentle on flesh. Lips tarried, pressing against skin as it heated under the flush of desire. When his name was whispered and then gasped, Jiraiya felt neediness take hold, but still he moved slow, prolonging and building desire in layers until she arched and shook with the force of her need.

Of course, Tsunade had never been one to be passive. Nails scored his back as they rolled and rolled again, mouths pressing earnestly as madness took hold. His fingers pressed into her thighs, leaving little aches behind as he jerked them up around his waist.

Pressing into her was nearly his undoing.

Words fell from his lips, praises and curses mingled together as the Sannin rocked his hips. Again and again he pressed forward, backward until he felt that clutch around him; with a half mad laugh he followed her lead.

When the sheets cooled and they were tangled together under them, her soft huffs of breath against his chest, Jiraiya wondered if this was a sort of mad dream. Tsunade had spoken briefly of her time in the jutsu, not dwelling on the hard memories of her dead lover and younger brother being alive.

If he'd been caught in that jutsu, would his dream had been this or a blast into their past and the girl who always told him no, giving him a chance?

She poked his side. "You're thinking too hard. It's keeping me awake."

The arm around her tightened in a hug of apology even has the Toad Sage suppressed a yelp. "Sorry Hime, my mind is running regardless of how tired my body is."

"Mhmmm, tell me what you're thinking about."

He lifted his free hand to pinch nostrils, a sure sign of embarrassment. "I… well I was debating if my infinite dream would have been to be like we are now or us to getting together before the Second war."

"There wouldn't have been an 'us' after the Second Shinobi war, even if I'd been in the village when you came home. You abandoned me Jiraiya. I was so close to breaking after Dan died, and that fear of blood was already taking root. I understand wanting to raise those orphans, but you abandoned the team that needed you to do it."

"You blame me? Hime, I did choose you. Again and again I went to you, asking for you to love me back and you refused. Don't blame me for the one time I put someone other than you first."

She sat up, naked and enraged at him. She had broke after the war, lost the man she'd wanted to build her life with and needed her teammate to cope, not someone wanting to be her lover… a friend and someone to comfort her. And, and he'd left her. Orochimaru left her for his labs and experiments.

Everyone left.

"I do blame you! Dan died under my hands and you refused to even acknowledge that he existed. I loved him. I planned on marrying him and raising a family and it was a just gone."

Jiraiya launched himself up, grabbing her hands and praying to whatever deity was listening for a way to defuse the situation. "Hime, I can't take back my actions, and I wouldn't change saving those orphans… even knowing what came later. Keeping those kids safe, saved me. Please, please know…" what did he want to say to her, what words could mend this void. "Please-"

Tsunade twisted her wrists in his grasp, accompanying the movement with a jerk towards her to completely undo his hold. "Please what Jiraiya; help you remove your foot from your mouth? Give you a way out of this argument?"

"Please stop being a bitch" The words were out of his mouth before his mind could process how bad of an idea it was saying them. Jiraiya scrambled back, taking blankets with him and putting both hands over his manhood. He had always hoped to die right after sex, but not quite like this.

She made a sound more like a wild animal than a woman. There things the Sannin tolerated, being called a bitch was not one of them. "What did you just say to me?"

He gulped and inwardly cursed. If she threw him out the window, that was a lot glass and he was a lot of naked. Still his pride while smaller than it normally was refused to let him back down "I said" Will of Fire he was a dead man "Please stop being a… b-bitch."

Anything else he planned to say, any apologies or pleas for mercy were lost as Tsunade's knee landed squarely in his gut. She rode him to floor cursing all the way and cocked a fist back intent on breaking his nose. Jiraiya, not wanting a face lift dug his heels into the ground bucking up and rolling his back so that their positions were reversed. "Hime, this is kind of proving my point."

"Take it BACK!" Tsunade started to bring her legs up, intent on squeezing him into submission when evidence of what skin to skin content did to him became evident. Amber eyes widened. "Baka, I'm trying to kill you and you're thinking of sex."

"… I really can't will this away Tsunade. You'll just have to accept that when you're touching me, this happens."

She blew out a breath and dropped her legs back to the floor. "Apologize and I won't kill you in your sleep."

Jiraiya laughed weakly and risked maiming to press a friendly kiss to her nose. "I'm sorry."

"Apology accepted, now get off and put your clothes on."


	12. Chapter 12

"You know Hime, I had thought when you re-grew my arm… it would look like the rest of me." Jiraiya mused as he shifted the warm weight of her higher up on his back. "No offense to the best medic in the world mind you, but it looks like you stole an arm from Orochimaru and sewed it to me."

Tsunade chuckled weakly, before leaning her head against the broad expanse of his back. "Baka, I'm a medic not a genjutsu user. You should have hunted Orochimaru down and asked him how he superimposed his body over others. Then you wouldn't have one arm pale and the other tan."

"Please if I'm going to look up that snake, it won't be to ask advice on jutsu."

She yawned and tightened her arms around him, grateful beyond mentioning that he hadn't said a word about her legs giving out and just picked her up like it was an everyday occurrence. "He came to the village you know, after I got sick and you had to take that mission. I opened my eyes and he was just sitting there calm as ice in the wing back chair."

Jiraiya's hands tightened squeezing her thighs until the Godaime's muttered yelp and slap upside the head broke the trance. "Did he try to hurt you Hime?"

"Bah, even sick as I am he wouldn't stand a chance." It was an obvious lie, but one she hoped would help soothe the tension. "No, he offered me a zetsu clone. The old snake has realized that he's close to being the last of his generation. It bothers him I think." She yawned again and felt her eyes start to close. The sickness was bad enough, but this bone tired weary was the worst by far. "I turned him down of course, told him if he didn't want to be alone, he was always welcome to die with me..."

She was asleep again. Jiraiya could feel her body relax against him. He hated it, hated how this strong woman had been reduced to chakra barely holding together flesh. When she'd gotten ill, he'd guised one last mission and went out in search of Orochimaru himself. He'd never tell her about it, or about his pleas to the other Sannin to help.

Five years just wasn't enough time.

His geta'd feet walked slowly on the path to Shikkotsu Forest. When she'd fallen ill and that blonde hair turned white nearly overnight, Tsunade had only one request. The Senju clan started in the woods and she wanted it to end there as hated her for asking. How could she ask him to watch her die? How could he say no?

He walked until the sun set and the stars became their beacons. She never stirred, only curled up into a ball when he shifted her to the ground and laid his vest over her shoulders.

It was in the stillness of the dark that he saw them, those yellowed eyes of the snake he used to call a friend. One hand curled around a kunai while the other dropped protectively to Tsunade. The last time they'd fought, he'd been drugged and Orochimaru had nearly killed her. That would not be happening this time.

There was a tittering laugh as he walked out of the woods, as if the snake knew exactly what Jiraiya was thinking and was laughing at him for it. "Be calm Oaf. Didn't Tsunade-hime tell you I left her unharmed before?"

Jiraiya's jaw tightened at the thought of them being spied on and him not realizing it. Regardless of her fragile state, Tsunade was still a very high bounty in the Bingo book. It made him want to rise from his crouch and show the bastard just what he was capable of.

"Idiots the pair of you" Tsunade spoke weakly, and pulled herself into a sitting position, irritably shaking off Jiraiya's helping hand. Her shoulders curved as if the weight of her life pushed them towards the ground, too much for the shrunken frame to support. "I'm glad you're here Orochimaru. I need to talk to both of you."

The Godaime paused as a coughing fit took her. Worrisome more was the gasping after the barks of sound, evidence that the Sannin couldn't get the oxygen she needed to her lungs. When she calmed, it became apparent that though the mask of indifference stayed firmly in place, Orochimaru had walked halfway across the clearing and had his hand out. _Perfect_

"I need you to promise me, both of you promise that you'll let me have peace." Whiskey eyes focused on the Snake Sannin, though her hand reached for Jiraiya's. "I'll have none of this Edo Tensei. I don't want my cells, degenerated as they are used for anything. The Senju clan… my clan ends with me. I want to be put in the care of Lady Katsuyu and left there."

"Hime, you don't mean-"

"Of course she does Jiraiya. Our Lady Tsunade is smart enough to know that even without a bloodline limit, Senju cells are a commodity. All sorts of unwashed would want to get their hands on it. I'll assume you're throwing me in with that mix Hime."

She laughed weakly. "I am indeed. Who could resist the cells and legacy there for the taking?"

Orochimaru refrained from saying her cells were a poor substitute compared to the ones he had of Hashirama. Of course even the god of Shinobi wasn't that delightful mix of Senju and Uzumaki. There was temptation there now, a chance to explore the unknown. His eyes shifted to the one who stood in his way and the kunai clenched tightly in the Toad Sage's fist.

Then again, what could she really offer him.

"Tsunade you can't do this. I would have never agreed to take you to the forest. It's desecration to be melted like some sort of plague victim."

"I'm done talking about it Jiraiya. I won't have my body raised against my will. I'm trusting both of you to make sure that doesn't happen. I'm trusting you to help me make it to the forest Jira, and you Orochimaru… if you would to keep Jiraiya from having a moment of weakness."

Slitted eyes narrowed before he nodded sharply. "I'll play my part Hime, though this changes nothing about my ambitions."

"Of course not, but it'll be a different generation stopping you this time neh?"

The words were spoken to the dark. The rogue Sannin disappearing as quickly as he had shown himself.

Jiraiya huffed and unsealed another blanket to lay over her. He moved to a squat, prepared to stand guard through the night over his charge, but her voice beckoned him to lie down. He did, reluctantly and pulled her into his arms. She was smaller than she'd been, the journey seeming to sap even the last of her reserves. Would she live to make it to the forest tomorrow?

"Hime, please don't die tonight. I can't- I can't wake up and you be dead in my arms." Tears she'd made him swore to hold back leaked out.

"Baka, I bet you I'll live through the night." Her words were whispered, a numbness taking hold in her limbs as sheer exhaustion drug her down. "Trust me; I never lose when I bet my life."

The sun broke the horizon, its tender light brightening the Sannin who held his lover. Jiraiya was awake, had been awake since that stillness during the night when Tsunade exhaled and never inhaled again. He couldn't make himself move. If he stayed still, if he held on to her and kept her warm… she wasn't really dead right?

His big frame shook with sobs as a cool hand touched his back. "She's gone then. The Slug Princess went home to her brother. Come on then Oaf. Let's carry out her wishes."

Jiraiya pinched his eyes shut, lids pressing hard until even the hint of moisture was gone. "Dan better take good care of her until I come for her. I'll blacken his eyes if he doesn't."

He'd had her for five years.

Five years wasn't near enough time.


End file.
